Wooly worm.

What is your go to reaction to anything hard?

Me?  I retreat. 

The comfort and safety of my home, and more specifically my bed has always been an easy “solution”.  I think of a caterpillar, or wooly worm as my grandmother called them.  We see them inching along and if they feel a threat, they curl up into themselves until it has passed.  Are they truly protected and safe?  Not really, as they are still seen, but the instinct is to do what they know and what feels familiar.

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Ruth and Naomi.  A story that illustrates so well how we as women tend to operate.  Naomi is a wife and mother.  Her husband moves the family to another country because of hardships.  Then, he dies, AND her 2 sons also die, leaving Naomi and her 2 daughters-in-law to figure things out.  Naomi decides it’s best to move back home.  The 2 daughters-in-law decide they will stay with her.  But, as most women do, in true selfless fashion, Naomi tells them both to move on.  Go find other lives.  I’ll be ok, she says….even though she really has no idea what she’s going to do to survive and feels like God has forgotten her.  Through lots of tears, one leaves…but Ruth…she stays.  She tells Naomi she is not going anywhere, that she is in this for the long haul.  Naomi, undoubtedly relieved, accepted her decision to stay even though neither of them knew what the future might hold.

We are both of these women.

Like Naomi, we often choose to struggle alone, than cause someone else to bear our burden. 

Like Ruth, we see another woman hurting and ache for her and offer what we can to help.

I have been in a season of some struggle.  And when that happens to me, I go full wooly worm.  But as I journey through life, living with the knowledge that some of the struggles I face are not going to change or go away, I must learn to be open to other ways of embracing these kinds of seasons.  When we acknowledge the hard parts of life and especially when they become more intense, what if we kept inching along instead of curling up and pretending like that’s going to make it better?

If we are willing to allow God into our hard…whatever that is, He will honor that.  I don’t know what that may look like for you, but He will.

One of my personal struggles pertains to my health.  It is a big trigger for me.  When something health related pops up, my anxiety stands up and says, “I’m here, ready to lead!”. 

I am learning how important it is to open myself up to how God will work in my life during these harder moments.  When we just do that bit, that opening of ourselves instead of closing in…it can make such a difference.

What does that look like in real life? 

Well, I don’t know how it may play out in your life, but for me, I have to stay engaged.  So, continuing to press on and do what I need to do, and let God do what He does.

For example, my sweet friend shared her health journey at our Wednesday evening women’s group.  Just showing up and being there was such a gift.  She is so faithful and I put another tool in my toolbox of how I can react in hard situations. 

And then, on an especially hard day, I decided I really needed to just get out of the house and I slowly and somewhat aimlessly wondered around Target for probably close to 2 hours, getting items I actually needed, but also just puttering in a bit of a fog.  In God’s perfect timing, I ran into a woman I knew from high school and we had what I think was likely a needed conversation for both of us.  She shared with me about some very real struggles in her own life, including the health of her husband which is very serious and uncertain. 

I did nothing except for staying in it and continuing on and I believe God honored that by bringing interactions with other women to me, and I was given those moments of realizing that I am in blessed company with others who live in the hard too.  Could I have been the conversation they needed that day?   I think that’s very possible. 

So.

Maybe have a chat with Jesus today.  Tell him where it’s hard for you right now.  Ask for his guidance, and let him know where you are feeling scared and what you don’t want to do.  And….decide keep going.  He will do the heavy lifting.  Accept the help, don’t struggle alone.  Read the story of Naomi and Ruth, grab a Bible or get on your phone and look it up.  God will meet you right there, wherever that is for you today dear sister.

But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you.  Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay.  Your people will be my people and your God my God.”  Ruth 1:16

Love and light to you all,

Dawn